1 is the loneliest number. But it doesn’t have to be.

Posted on August 27, 2014


A week ago I wrote a blog post about depression and how I was given some advice from someone via email that I was never alone. I empathized greatly with those that had suffered in any form because it’s a dark place of negativity and self-loathing that everyone at some point in their lives goes through. It’s a body and soul numbing sapping agent, killing any kind of positivity and appreciation for any interests one might have.

Our natural inclination as humans for the most part is to be social and interact so we can better know one another. Through these exchanges we can grow as people in every sense mentally, spiritually and psychologically. Though some might perhaps be a tad introverted in respect to their personality, that’s not to say that they necessarily shun being the centre of attention. I myself adapt to the occasion wherever I might see fit. I can be as quiet and still as can be, but I’m also very capable of being the loudest person at a social gathering.

Although I can shape shift my mood for most occasions, it took time to train myself that the voices in my head were playing tricks on me. Most times, no one really cares if my voice is slightly too loud or if I get a little carried away with laughing on occasion. And if they did, then it was their problem.

I got teased quite openly for being alone in eateries with a book in my hand being asked if I was sure I really wanted a table for one, though there were two seats. As I aged and became more self-assured and cared less for people’s judgments and thoughts (because ultimately you can’t control them), I became more comfortable in my own self, a new-found confidence to say that if anything, you have to be worth my time.

For those going to restaurants or the cinema on your own, being met with those piercing staring eyes that meet yours but for a split second can be torture. But again, I reiterate that if anyone should feel the slightest bit insecure it should be those that can’t manage without their group of mates or spouse. And they’re environments that can be so unforgiving and merciless if you’re by yourself because they encourage people to talk amongst themselves.

Whether you agree or not with either viewpoint is another matter. But if you still feel you need support or advice whatsoever, there’s a plethora of places to turn to. Being self-defeatist is a hurdle we must and can jump over. But it takes a positive mindset, the right support and help to do so.

Such a place is Mind – a mental health charity providing help and support for those that have a whole host of problems. Their mission is providing advice and support to empower anyone experiencing a mental health problem. They campaign to improve services, raise awareness and promote understanding. According to their website, one in four of us will experience some sort of mental health problem. Below is a video of Stephen Fry explaining more about their work.

One might be the loneliest number, but it really shouldn’t be. There are other people to make up the numbers for all of us.

Posted in: Social